Friending

[bluespirit]

I get too emotional & let things upset me too much. I know that - & that's my issue.
I suffer from depression (I had to give up a job I loved because of it) & have to be really careful to insulate myself as best I can from things that will upset me. Some people may think that's cowardly but it's a coping mechanism.
I think I'm going to have to spend less time online & use that time for other things.
If we've grown apart (fandoms/interests change - it happens) or you're only here for certain media posts I might make & those posts may now be ending or you really only want to read my fic or look at my art (it's all posted to my archiving lj: starshinedreams) or for any other reason - then please don't worry about removing me from your flist.
The whole word 'friending' (or 'defriending') is such an emotional minefield but think of it as a reading list. If you want to take me off your reading list then I won't be offended. In a similar way I think I have to make some cuts to my own reading list in the next few days - nothing drastic but just to give me some breathing room.

*hugs*

Comments

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thank you.
No - I don't filter anything. I just try to always be upbeat in my lj (well, as much as is possible.) My depression is so much better than it used to be & is more or less at a plateau now but I still have to be careful; hence me insulating myself away from triggers.
I just need to scale back for a while - but hope to still make posts about my silly Buddy & hopefully post more fic & art as I do them.

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thanks, sweetheart.
*hugs*

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Aw, thank you.
I don't intend to leave - I'll just be a little more scarce until I get my head sorted out properly.
*hugs*

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Bless you!
*hugs*

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thank you.
I just need to take a step back for a little while - popping in with the fics & art I hope to be creating. :-)

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thanks, sweetheart.
*hugs*

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thank you.
*hugs*

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thanks, sweetheart (& no - I really hope we can stay friended, if you don't mind.)
I don't want to leave lj or fandom because I love SGA so much. I just need to spend more time enjoying it - reading, writing, etc - & not stressing over things.

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Oh, of course. I really didn't mean this post to sound diva-ish or anything.
*hugs*
I just want to be able to enjoy fandom & not stress myself out.

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much, S.
I just shocked myself with the intensity of my reaction - it was that more than the actual issue that made me so upset. I'm the only person who can sort out these feelings & so I'm trying to be proactive - I love SGA & don't want to lose that joy or my creativity. This way I hope I can spend more of my online time enjoying reading fic & sharing fic & art of my own.
Oh, & I definitely still have your header on my list, never fear.

Aw, kiss that H for me please - & ATG & the rest of the gang!
*big Buddy hugs*

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Yes, it's not something related to a single fandom, is it? *sigh* I remember all the upset we went through.
*hugs*
Thanks, C - I think I just need to take positive stpes to keep the joy I have for SGA.

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

That is so thoughtful of you - what a wonderful sentiment. Thank you.
*big Buddy hugs*

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thanks you.
*hugs*
I just want to concentrate more on creativity & the joy of it than getting upset with things out of my control.

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thanks again, A.
*hugs*
You're right - it's amazing how good a lovely walk with Bud can be for clearing my head & getting things into perspective.

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thank you.
*hugs*

[bluespirit-star.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Finn.
I just don't want people thinking this is a cry to come & stroke my ego or anything. It's nothing like that at all. I just felt that I wanted to explain.
I'm not swishing my cape around my shoulders & storming out - just making my flist more managable so that I can hopefully spend more of my online time enjoying things.
*hugs*

[the-cephalopod.livejournal.com]

*hugs you tight*

I completely understand & am so glad you're making a proactive decision. I love interacting with you & your friendship has made my time on LJ so much richer. Thank you. ♥

cep xxx

[neevebrody.livejournal.com]

Well I know I can make the boys angsty at times. I do try and put them back together, though. ;) But you... you are always someone I go to if I need a lighter heart - someone who obviously loves life and whose stories always reflect that. I'm so bad sometimes about reading and not commenting. (I intend to change that in the coming year) I'll often read at work thinking to go back and leave feedback later and well... good intentions...

I was away from my computer for most of the day yesterday and spent the wee hours of this morning reading the wank - not to bring up a sore subject, but I felt that might have been part of your post. It's sad and so unnecessary. I do hope that you will concentrate on the things you love and your creativity, both with words and with art, and not let this linger too much. Yes, the show's over, but fandom is still here and those of us who love the boys know how to treat them and will take very good care of them for a long time to come.

*hugs you tight*

[angels21k.livejournal.com]

Honey. Please don't be upset by something some eejit has said/inferred. Their problem is with themselves NOT you.
Depression is horrid - & yes, I do speak from experience - but try and keep away from these repellent triggers.
You have a lot going for you;love from family, Buddy and friends. You are unique and the world needs you. You don't need folk who seem to take this new tech as a reason to forget thinking before speaking and totally ignore manners. The immediacy of communication in this age has a lot to answer for although the perks are sooo good.
Buy an orange fleece and suddle up in a Rodney hug.

Love A
xx

[ladyoflisquill.livejournal.com]

The whole word 'friending' (or 'defriending') is such an emotional minefield but think of it as a reading list.

This is a really good way to look at it. I think the whole idea of 'friending' is so loaded.

[sonicbookmark.livejournal.com]

The whole word 'friending' (or 'defriending') is such an emotional minefield

Ain't it just??? I know I let myself become entirely too upset when someone cuts me or doesn't friend me back. I hate it but I can't help it.

You do what you have to do to get yourself feeling better. If that means less time on lj than so be it. I'll miss you (and Buddy) but I want you to be happy!

♥♥♥

[ariadne83]

I'm keeping you on my list; feel free to do whatever you need to. I may not comment much but your posts are always a bright spot, and (this is going to sound stupid) you were there for me when my cat died, which means a lot.

Good luck and happy writing :-)

[aurora]

As I said in argosy's post, I do apologize for having upset you. I do think you're a wonderful person and I think we've gotten along pretty well in the past. However, if you feel that our LJ-friendship cannot really take what happened yesterday or might be heavily strained in the future, you should feel free to defriend me. The choice is yours.

[betagoddess.livejournal.com]

I suffer from SAD and our son is bipolar (of a lesser known type) and I know how horrible it can make you feel. I think that avoiding things you KNOW are going to bother you is the right thing to do. I wish you all the best with this plan.

::biggest hugs::

[argosy.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I understand depression. I found that filters were extremely helpful to me earlier this year when I was dealing with some things. However you decide to handle it, stepping back from things that upset you (especially on the internet) is a good thing. *hugs again* And more writing is always good!

eta: Since I have been dealing with such a huge thing, I haven't been commenting to your posts as much as I'd like, but I did want you to know that I've enjoyed them very much and they are always a bright spot. Yay, Buddy!