bluespirit: (Rascal)
Bluespirit ([personal profile] bluespirit) wrote2008-04-14 08:41 am
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Thank you all so very much

I just want to say a huge thank you for all the love & support at Rascal's passing.
I will reply to everyone but I'm still a bit numb at the moment.
I keep hearing him around the house & expecting to see him in his basket or coming to wake me up with a big black nose in my face first thing in the morning (the best way to be woken up ever!)
I haven't been able to put his things away yet - his beds & toys are still where he left them. I don't even want to hoover 'cus I'd be hoovering up his hairs.
I'll do it in my own time - perhaps when we get his ashes & bring him home for good.

In the meantime I've felt the need to be doing a lot of gardening for some reason. We've bought a rose bush to plant in Rask's memory. It's called 'Sunseeker' which we thought was appropriate as he always loved to lie in the sun - he'd follow a patch of sunlight all around the carpet & we had the conservatory built so that he could lie in there when he wanted. I'm comforted by the fact that even on his last morning with us he lay out on the patio in the sunshine.

I've ordered two big canvas prints of Rask - one for the lounge & one for the dining room (though I may get more.) We already have lots of photos of him around the house but I felt the need to stay connected, to be doing something Rascal-related & so I ordered them. They should be gorgeous (because he was) & I can't wait for them to arrive.

I know it's true that Rask had a good, long, happy life & that we have so many (many, many!) wonderful memories of him. However, at the moment I can't help wanting more - I have this gaping hole in my heart & I want him to be here. I know it will get easier with time but he was such a huge personailty.
My beautiful, silly, sweet boy. ♥


Here he is, soaking up the sun last year. (This is exactly where he lay on Wed morning - his favourite patio sunseeking spot!)

[identity profile] betagoddess.livejournal.com 2008-04-14 06:34 pm (UTC)(link)

'Sunseeker' sounds just PERFECT for Rascal! What a lovely way to remember him by! Not that you'll ever forget him, of course!

It's been eight months since Sparkle died and yet every single night when I go to bed, just for a second, I think of being careful not to bump her. For seventeen and a half years she slept on her rug on the floor right at the head of my side of the bed.

I still have her collar with her name tag and license hanging from the shelves in our bathroom.

Their lives are just never long enough, but such love and happiness they bring to ours. =>}

::biggest hugs::

[identity profile] bluespirit-star.livejournal.com 2008-04-18 03:30 pm (UTC)(link)
I've planted the rose! I mixed some of Rask's hairs into the soil around it & put a solar lamp by it too - like a candle for him. ♥

It is the tiny, routine things, like you checking not to bump Sparkle, that get to you, isn't it? So many habits & loving routines that we build up over the years.
*hugs*

[identity profile] betagoddess.livejournal.com 2008-04-18 07:04 pm (UTC)(link)

I'll be looking forward to pictures of Rascal's rose and the solar lamp. They sound beautiful. =>}

Seventeen and a half years isn't a long life compared to ours, but after so long with Sparkle in our lives, her passing leaves many empty spaces. You're right! That's what gets to you!

::hugs::